i cleaned my room and lost my ipod.

i always told mom that if everything was on the floor, i knew where everything was. i was so right. i tidied up my room last night...nothing major, just reorganized drawers and made sure the floor was cleared. in the process, my ipod disappeared.

i love my ipod. for me, listening to a song on my ipod can completely transform my day. it's my song, and i'm hearing it and no one else around me has any idea what amazing things are going on because they can't hear them. "can't take it in" by imogen heap is one of those songs. can't close my eyes, they're wide awake. every hair on my body has got a thing for this place. when i hear this song, i remember why i'm here and that i really love the moments where i'm walking by physical plant but all i see are the lush green jungle ridges of the hawaiian mountains against a bright blue sky. or when i take a minute to forget i'm in class and just look at my classmates (discreetly, of course) and realize how much it means to have a class of 15 have students of 10 different nationalities. oh, empty my heart, i've got to make room for this feeling. so much bigger than me...i can't take it in...

and i remember, it's all ok.

but now my ipod is lost somewhere in the 8x8 space in my room and i can't find it and for some impossible reason, playing the same music on itunes doesn't have the same affect at all. that's not at all ok.